How To Deal With Rejection
Getting rejected can be a very unpleasant event. That’s why many of us have developed a fear of rejection, and that fear is holding us back in life. Because we fear being rejected, we become inactive and begin to procrastinate. That’s why you need to learn how to deal with rejection.
First of all you need to realize that by getting rejected you don’t really lose anything. On the other hand you actually lose a lot if you do nothing and procrastinate just because you are afraid of being rejected. Just think for a moment, how could your life be different if you weren’t afraid of rejection and you actually did whatever you were afraid of?
Don’t you think that you could have achieved so much more? You could have gained so much more experience and could live a much different life.
Whenever you start to procrastinate because of your fear or rejection, remember that you can only gain with this experience.
Let’s say for example, that you are afraid of asking your boss for a raise, because you fear that you could get rejected. Well, if you do nothing about it, you won’t get a raise. So you lose. On the other hand if you actually do something about it, you can get a positive or a negative answer. In worst case you are at the same place as if you didn’t do anything, but there is actually a great chance that you do get a raise.
So if you act, you can only gain. Remember that. Even if you get rejected, you have still learnt something from that experience. So in the end you are actually richer for that one experience and this can actually help you build up your self-esteem.
What other people say to you doesn’t affect your self-esteem!
In reality it’s you who affects your self-esteem. Only you have the power to feel good about yourself or to feel bad.
It’s what you say to yourself after someone has insulted you, that affects your self worth. It’s you who gives meaning to the conversation.
You can easily see an insult from two very different points of view.
For example, you could get insulted and very unhappy if someone told you something that you don’t like. But you could easily just smile and think to yourself that this person has low self esteem if he or she needs to insult other people in order to feel good.
See, these are two completely different points of view and it’s your decision how you will react.
How to deal with rejection when you have a tendency to generalize?
The problem with generalizing is that we generalize everything. If you get rejected a few times, you start to believe that everyone rejects you. And this kind of generalization is very bad for your self confidence.
You need to realize that you have family and friends that don’t reject you. We all have, and if you believe that you don’t have any friends, you really need to change your point of view.
I’m sure that you had friends at some time and if you don’t have any friends in your life right now, you’ve probably lost them because you’ve stopped hanging out with them.
Of course, friends come and go, so don’t worry. You can always get new friends. If you feel anxious just by thinking about talking to strange people, you might have social anxiety. If you suffer from social anxiety, you can watch the video on how to overcome it. Just put your email in the form on the right and I’ll send you the video for free.
Now, a good way to find new friends is to attend a social anxiety support group. They provide a safe environment for people with social anxiety, where you can meet other people that will help you out.
Overcoming rejection by changing focus
Whenever we get rejected, we immediately focus on the negative. We start thinking about the rejection and how bad the situation is. We become embarrassed and after a few rejections we begin to avoid situations that could potentially lead to rejection.
That’s how you can develop social anxiety.
So change your focus to something positive whenever you get rejected. You can focus on the learning. I’m sure you can learn a lot from every rejection. You can learn how not to do it next time, so you can do it differently next time.
Just stay positive.
Also keep in mind, that if you got rejected by someone, it doesn’t mean that you’ll get rejected by everyone else. There are plenty of opportunities for you out there.
How to deal with rejection, so that you won’t feel rejected?
You need to change your response to rejection. If you always become upset or even depressed after getting rejected, you need to change your response.
Try looking at rejection from a different point of view. Try to learn something from it.
Welcome rejection in your life! This might sound harsh to you, but it’s a great way to learn how to deal with rejection. You’ll see that it will only make you stronger.
At first it’s going to be uncomfortable, but in order to grow you’ve got to be a little uncomfortable. You need to get out of your comfort zone once in a while.
You’ll see that everything becomes more comfortable after a while and so does rejection. Learning to talk wasn’t easy. In fact it was uncomfortable, but you did it and now you can talk.
Everything was uncomfortable at first but you managed to get through it and it’s the same with rejection.